Dear Thiago, no, I am not lost

Every once in a while, somebody comes around and thinks that I am lost. He may imply it through a thinly veiled insult, or he may insinuate it through the way he engages with my work. It is a common enough motif that young people are lost, and even that old people are lost, that when somebody is not sure what he is seeing, this is an easy enough framework to reach for.

I am not lost. I will tell you what is going on with me, or has been going on with me when you say this.

There is a difference between being lost, and not seeing hierarchies that you can reasonably climb. There is also a difference between being lost, and not seeing hierarchies you believe in.

In order to make a move “forward,” what you are really talking about is a move “up.” When you are talking a move “up” you are talking about a move up some “ladder.”

There is not one fixed ladder. There are many ladders, and people are climbing different ones for different reasons. One person may be climbing the ladder of making as much money as possible. One person may be trying to get laid as much as possible. One person may be trying to climb up the ranks of academia. One person may be trying to have as many kids as possible. One person may be trying to climb up their literal corporate ladder.

People climb a ladder because they think there is something at the top worth having. They do not exert effort to climb arbitrarily. They climb because they see something they want up there.

When people don’t believe in the reward anymore, or don’t think the reward is worth the cost, or don’t think that the next step up the ladder is possible for them personally, they may appear “lost.” In fact, “stuck” is a better description, because they are not lost, and “finding themselves” will not help them. In fact, they probably know exactly where they are, and the futility of their options.

But even “stuck” is not a good word for what many people are going through in this current moment. They genuinely do not believe in the existing hierarchies, and they genuinely do not believe in the rewards either. What is the point of taking the next step if it leads nowhere?

And they are not wrong about thinking this. Our institutions are discrediting themselves with overly obtuse ideologies, that are aimed to give them legitimacy in a diverse world, but only discredit themselves further and further.

Our corporations are becoming more and more inhumane, with each person dispensable. You can work somewhere for 10 years in a head position, and still be dispensable when one manager does not like you and it’s layoff season.

If everyone was just lost, we could poke them about, or send them off on a road trip, and they would come back stronger and ready to take on the world.

The problem is when they do come back from the road trip, what they see is disaster and a society that not just punishes them for doing wrong, but most of the time, punishes them from doing right, too.

They do the right things to climb, and are knocked down anyway. Why not sit at home collecting Covid checks? That’s the smart thing to do. Who knows how long it will last.